


How to be a man

by creaniall



Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Bisexual Tony Stark, Dirty Talk, First Dates, M/M, Outing, Phalloplasty, Tony Stark Has A Heart, Trans Male Character, Trans Steve Rogers, Vaginal Fingering, Vaginal Sex, blowjob, mlm author, trans author
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-28
Updated: 2018-04-26
Packaged: 2019-04-14 01:09:20
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 5,908
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14124861
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/creaniall/pseuds/creaniall
Summary: Steve has told nobody in his team that he was born female. But when Tony Stark himself asks him out on a date he can´t keep his secret secret anymore.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Please note that I, the author, am a bisexual trans-man, so this work is not some weird fetish story. Besides that, english is not my native language, please tell me if you find mistakes! (I hope I got the quotation marks right this time :p)

Tony entered the living room while Steve was sitting on the sofa and watching news. He tried to stay up to date but the 21st century was just too fast for his 1940s mind. Something worthy of being on the news seemed to happen 24 hours a day.   
“Hey Cap,” Tony said, placing himself comfortably in Steve´s space.   
Captain America tilted his head.   
“Hey Tony. Has something come up?” Tony usually spent the days downstairs in his workshop. Sometimes he left this place to have dinner with the team but more often than not Steve wouldn´t catch a glimpse of him in days.   
“Um...”   
Steve caught Tony blushing and it was probably the cutest thing he had seen in years. It was hard to make Anthony Edward Stark blush; Tony was usually confident, proud and egocentric. He always knew how to make a situation less awkward and what to say to whom. Steve had only ever met one person as charismatic as Tony – his father Howard Stark.   
Considering that the only time the billionaire couldn´t find the right words was when he had a near death experience Steve started to worry about his friend and teammate. He muted the TV, crossed the arms in front of hist chest and waited for the confession of a problem Tony caused.   
“Don´t look at me like that!” Tony pouted. “That´s the “I´m disappointed” stare and I don´t deserve that!”  
“I decide if I´m disappointed in you or not,” Steve tried to calm his friend, relaxing the arms he had crossed in front of his upper body. He didn´t want to fight with Tony.   
“I just wanted to ask if you´re free tonight, not confess all my dirty secrets to you.”  
Steve sighed. Sometimes Tony drove him mad with his cocky attitude.   
“Yes, I am free,” he answered. “Do you need help with one of your experiments?”  
“No. Just wanted to ask if you´d have dinner with me.” It didn´t sound just as confident as he would usually expect from Tony.   
“Dinner?” he repeated.   
The billionaire rolled his eyes and jumped back onto his feet.   
“Jesus, Rogers! I´m asking you out for a date! Didn´t you have dates back in sixteenhundredfour? Do you even know what a date is?”  
Now it was Steve who blushed. Somehow he seemed to have missed out on weeks of body language. That was probably due to the fact that the Avengers had to save the world at least three times during the last eight weeks but still. He could have noticed earlier.   
“Yes,” he simply answered.   
“Was that a “Yes, I know what a date is” or a “Yes, I´d like to go on a date with you”? Because I´m gonna drink a whole liquor store if I make a fool out of myself again, Rogers.”  
“Yes, I´d like to go on a date with you,” Steve smiled and watched how Tony´s shoulders relaxed.   
“I´ll pick you up at your room at seven.” The billionaire looked away, almost shyly. “Please don´t embarrass me and wear something better than your usual cargo pants and t-shirt, Rogers!”  
“I promise.” He just had to smile again but Tony didn´t notice. He was excusing himself and hurried back to his workshop. Steve unmuted the TV and the smile froze on his face.   
He would need to tell Tony that he wasn´t male underneath his clothes. That he was born female. That he was not the man Tony was hoping to date.   
Anxiously biting his lower lip the soldier tried to calm himself. He would tell Tony when the billionaire picked him up. If Tony had a problem with it he could politely get out of the situation. If he didn´t mind they could still go on a date. Tony wouldn´t use this information against him, right? They were friends. Of course Tony wouldn´t tell anybody. 

Steve looked at himself in the mirror. Broad shoulders, strong arms, perfectly shaped pecs and his packer was hold in place in his black jeans. There was no sign of his lack of a real penis. Nobody would be able to tell. He was going to be fine.   
He repeated this to himself while getting dressed. He chose a white dress shirt that was just a little bit to tight with a black vest on top. Nothing too fancy but hopefully elegant enough for a date with the Tony Stark.   
When Tony knocked on the door Steve nearly tripped over his own feet before he managed to open the door to his room. Since they lived inside the same building Tony picking him up felt a bit weird but Tony looked so stunning Steve forgot about it almost immediately.   
The billionaire was wearing an expensive looking tuxedo. The decent make up he wearing could not cover up the slight blush on his face. He was too handsome. Steve was sure he would be able to look him into the eye.   
“I guess I´m coming a bit early,” Tony chuckled at his own dirty joke. “Don´t worry – doesn´t happen that often, I promise.”  
“No, no, I´m ready,” Steve answered and was about to change the topic to the fact that he had an uterus and a vagina instead of a penis and if this was a problem, but Tony cut him off by pointing at Steve´s feet.   
“I know I said you must not wear cargo pants but shoes are still required.”  
The soldier felt the redness spreading on his face.   
“I´ll be ready in a second,” he mumbled and hurried to put on a pair of black chelsea boots.   
They made their way into the garage where Tony picked one of the most expensive cars. As if he still had to impress Steve. Tony, charismatic as always, initiated some small talk and Steve just could not find the right moment to talk about his lack of a pair of male genitalia. He even forgot about it completely when they arrived at the place Tony had picked.   
He had been to fancy restaurants before but this night was special. He was having a date at a place where there were way too many forks and knifes laying besides his plate. The soldier carefully watched Tony to prevent embarrassing himself in front of the billionaire. Not again. The evening already had been embarrassing enough.   
They chatted while enjoying expensive wine and delicious steak with baked potatoes. Their topics changed from work to more private matters like Steve´s life before the war or Tony´s not so happy childhood. And Steve still couldn´t bring himself to reveal his past life as a woman to the billionaire.   
Tony was glowing. He smiled and laughed genuinely at the soldier´s stories from his childhood. While telling his own stories Tony always chose the right words. It was fun listening to him and whenever he talked about his robots his voice would go up a pitch. Steve couldn´t help but think about a proud mother talking about her children. He found it cute.   
It was half past ten when they made their way back to the tower. Still, Steve didn´t want the night to end just now. He was sitting in the right seat watching the lights of New York in the dark while Tony was driving.   
“How did you know I am interested in men?” he asked.   
Tony shrugged without looking away from the street.   
“It was just a guess. I know you had the hots for my dad so I thought I should at least try asking you out.”  
Steve absentmindedly stared out of the window.   
“That was nothing. Just a little boy with a crush on his mentor.”  
“Did you two fuck?” Tony sounded bitter.   
“No,” Steve hurried to answer. “We didn´t have....Fondue. We kissed once, that´s all.”  
“Yeah, I know. I´ve read my father´s diary.”  
The silence between the two men was heavy.   
“I´m sorry,” Steve finally said. “I should have told you in person.”  
Their eyes met.   
“But I really like you, Tony.”   
It was just a whispered confession but Tony stopped the car at a red traffic light, bend over and kissed Steve without hesitation. The soldier closed his eyes and relaxed. Their kiss only lasted a few seconds before Tony had to focus on the traffic again but it left Steve breathless and hungry for more.  
When the Stark Tower appeared in sight Steve sat up straight again, clearing his throat.   
“Tony... I need to tell you something.”  
The billionaire drove into the garage and opened the door for Steve who followed the other man to the elevator.   
“What´s on your mind, Cap?”  
Tony pressed the button to call the elevator. His eyes were so big and dark. The way he licked his lips would make Steve go insane for sure.   
“I´m....I´m not... I don´t have...” He stumbled upon the words. He had not had an outing in seventy years. Talking about as if it was something normal was hard.   
The doors of the elevator opened and the two men stepped in. Steve felt trapped while Tony ordered JARVIS to bring them to the common floors where he wanted to pick up a bottle of wine from the kitchen.   
“You´re a virgin?” Tony guessed innocently.   
“Yes,” Steve answered. He sounded out of breath. He couldn´t tell the other man. The night went so well, he had fun and he enjoyed kissing Tony. There was no way he was going to ruin that with a confession like this.   
Tony picked up a bottle of wine from the kitchen and when he turned around to the very startling looking soldier he smirked.   
“Don´t worry, Cap.” He licked his lips again and the simple gesture was enough to take Steve´s breath away. He was aroused only from the kiss they shared a few minutes earlier.   
He felt Tony´s lips on his again a second later. Slowly he closed his eyes and allowed the billionaire to enter his mouth. Tony tasted like wine and cigarettes and so much more. His tongue gently played with Steve´s, his touches making the soldier relax. He could hardly stop a moan escaping him.   
Tony smirked into the kiss that got deeper and filthier every second. The billionaire pressed himself against the taller man so Steve could feel something hard brushing his inner thigh. He was already out of breath when Tony pulled away.   
“Fuck, Cap!” he moaned. “You´re too sexy for this world.”  
The billionaire fell onto his knees in front of him and the sight alone made Steve´s breath hitch. He noticed that Tony was opening his belt.   
“Tony, no! Wait!”  
But the other man already pulled Steve´s pants and boxershorts down in an attempt to blow the soldier right then and there.   
There was a second of embarrassed silence. Tony stared at the crotch in front of him that probably looked nothing like he had expected. Only then he noticed the packer that had fallen out of Steves underwear and was laying next to his right foot on the ground.   
“Oh,” Tony said. And then, “Oh!”  
Their eyes met again but Steve looked away immediately.   
“So... you´re a woman then?”  
Steve could feel the tears in his eyes while heat spread across his faces.   
“I´m not a woman!”  
He hurried to pull his pants back up, took his packer and fled towards the elevator. Shame was burning on his cheeks and he wasn´t sure if he could hold back the tears any longer.   
“Steve!” Tony shouted, back on his feet.   
The soldier entered the elevator and ordered JARVIS to bring him upstairs to his bedroom but Tony managed to get in just before the doors closed. He was breathing heavily.   
“Okay, okay,” Tony tried again. “Not a woman. Are you a trans-man?”  
Steve stared at the closed doors of the elevator.   
“I don´t know that word,” he answered quietly. His face still felt hot but at least he didn´t cry yet.   
“Someone who was born female but now identifies as male,” Tony explained carefully.   
“I guess I am a trans-man then.”  
The doors of the elevator opened at Steve´s floor and both men got out.   
“When did you start your transition?” the billionaire asked. Somehow Steve managed to look at him again without tears in his eyes.   
“After my mother died... I was 18.”  
Another second of silence.   
“Did my father know?” Tony sounded scandalized.   
Steve shook his head.   
“Nobody knew except for Bucky.”  
They arrived at the door of Steve´s bedroom where they stopped, Steve´s eyes were glued to the ground.   
“I wanted to tell you earlier this night but...” His eyes were starting to feel wet again. Steve hated it.   
“It´s okay,” Tony said calmly. He took the soldier´s hand and gently kissed the fingertips. It made Steve´s skin crawl with arousal.   
“I´m sorry, Tony.”  
“Don´t be. I guess it wasn´t easy back then in 1940 and it´s not easy to be out now.” He kissed Steve´s cheek and smiled. “Do you still want to loose your virginity tonight?”  
Steve felt his arousal spark again. Heat was pooling in his lower body when he thought about Tony kneeled down in front of him. The billionaire smirked.   
“I can give pretty good blowjobs to guys without a dick, too, you know?”  
He placed a gentle kiss an Steve´s throat.   
“Do you want to fuck me, Cap? Because I want you to fuck me” he purred. “I have some toys for that occasion upstairs in my room.”  
Steve moaned and could feel Tony chuckling against his skin.   
“Maybe,” he said, “we should go to your room then.”


	2. Chapter 2

Waking up next to Tony in the morning was nice. His king sized bed felt warm and comfy, Tony´s legs intertwined with his own. Still sleepy, Steve opened his eyes only to find the billionaire already awake. He was laying on his stomach, reading something on his tablet.  
“Did you even sleep at all?” The soldier asked pulling Tony closer to place a kiss on his shoulder blade.  
“Four hours, maybe five,” Tony answered excited.  
He shoved his tablet in Steve´s face. Captain America blinked twice and stared at the collection of dicks on the screen. Each picture had a description that said something like “9 months post-op”, “Two years post-op, patient has full sensation”.  
“Tony,” he said, avoiding his gaze, “what is this?”  
“Penises of trans-men!” Tony´s voice was far too loud this early in the morning. “The surgeon takes a part of the forearm and forms a phallus that develops sensation over the course of a year. You can even get an erection rod and get a boner if you want to.”  
Steve took his time to examine the dicks on the screen further. He wouldn´t have guessed that those were not penises of men who were born with the right pair of genitals. Suddenly, he felt a strong urge to reach down his own legs where he found nothing.  
“They look good,” he finally said.  
“Do you want one?” Tony was looking at him waiting for an answer. He seemed to be even more excited than Captain America himself. “I can get you an appointment! You would have your very own dick within two weeks!”  
Steve sighed.  
“I don´t know...”  
The next second Tony was cuddled up against the soldier´s body, kissing his chest.  
“What´s on your mind, Cap? Don´t fancy having a penis?”  
Captain America´s long fingers disappeared between the billionaire´s black hair, gently scratching the scalp. The smaller man purred like a cat and moved into the other man´s touch. It was intimate in an entirely different way than their love-making (well, Steve had to admit that it was more fucking than love-making) last night.  
“I´d be on the news the second I show up at the clinic.”  
“Money can take care of that, too,” Tony assured him, his eyes still closed, his whole body relaxed. He looked so peaceful like that. Steve had never seen him this way before but he was happy for his friend – no, his lover.  
“Take your time, Cap.” The billionaire opened his dark, brown, beautiful eyes and they were so full of love and affection that it made Steve shudder in a good way. “You don´t have to make that decision today. Just... tell me if you made up your mind.”  
Carefully, Steve took Tony´s hands in his and kissed the knuckles while holding eye contact.  
“Thank you, Tony. That means a lot to me.”  
The cute blush crept back on the billionaire´s face and he hastily avoided Steve´s gaze.  
“Nevermind. Just helping my favorite soldier out.”  
“Favorite soldier? You talking about me?” Steve mumbled into the dark hair while he was kissing Tony´s scalp.  
“Dunno,” the billionaire answered. It was unusual to see him so shy, but Steve liked it. “I have to admit Thor looks pretty good, too- Ouch!”  
Steve´s teeth sunk into the sensitive skin on Tony´s neck.  
“Of course I´m talking about you, Cap,” the billionaire laughed. “I wanted to do this for so long, I...”  
They looked into each other´s eyes for a long moment.  
“Why didn´t you ask earlier?” It bothered Steve that they had taken so long to confess their mutual feelings.  
“You could have laughed.”  
Tony´s lips caressed Captain America´s truly impressive chest, tiny kisses and gentle nibbling. It made Steve starting to feel hot under the blankets, the smell of sex still in the air. With a sigh he closed his eyes.  
“I wouldn´t laugh about your feelings.”  
“Sometimes people do. Better to keep them for myself.” Tony didn´t offer another explanation. Instead, he kissed his way downwards, spending way too much time exploring Steven´s abs when Captain America just wanted this talented tongue between his legs.  
It still felt weird letting another man see him naked like that. Steve spread his legs, making himself vulnerable in a way he hadn´t experienced before.  
Tony´s fingers grabbed his thigh, caressing him until they reached what was between his legs. When the fingertips brushed his vulva Steve couldn´t help but moan, his hips bucking up from the mattress.  
“Until you decide whether or not you want a dick I´ll just have fun with the assets you already have,” Tony teased with a smirk.  
Steve who had hidden his face beneath his arm just nodded. Two fingers pushed in and the soldier whined. He grabbed Tony´s wrist to stop him.  
“Lube, please, I need... I mean... I can not...”  
The testosterone in combination with the super soldier serum made it hard for him to get wet enough for any intrusion. He should have told Tony, should have said something about his body being so unusual...!  
“Cap, calm down.” The billionaire kissed him affectionately. “I have enough experience for both of us, so don´t stress it.”  
With the help of lube Tony´s fingers slid in easily, stretching his partner carefully. Steve´s head fell back on the pillow and he relaxed his body with a sigh. His lover knew how to handle his body, working his fingers in and out until the heat in Steve´s lower body was unbearable.  
“Tony...!” he moaned. “I need more.”  
When he opened his eyes Tony leaned above him, kissing his nose.  
“Are you sure, Cap? I don´t want you to feel... dysphoric or anything.”  
“Tony!” Steve repeated. He was too shy to verbalize his need.  
Tony chuckled.  
“Less talking, more fucking, hm?”  
With a whine Steve spread his legs further. Tony kissed the inside of his thigh. He ripped open the packaging of the condom, used even more lube and lined himself up.  
The intrusion was harsh but once the cockhead was inside taking the rest of the shaft was easy. Steve moaned loudly. He needed a second to check in with himself but the lust was overwhelming, washing away the dysphoria he usually felt about his crotch area.  
He could feel Tony´s dick inside of him pulsing. He pulled the billionaire into a hug and kissed him deeply.  
The billionaire knew exactly what he was doing, driving Steve insane with his dick. It was different than last night, when Steve was on top. And he decided that he preferred fucking his partner over being fucked but for now feeling Tony on top and deep inside of him was fine.  
This morning, they made love and Steve loved every second of it. He loved their deep, filthy kisses, he loved the feeling of Tony thrusting into him, he loved blowing him later in the shower.  
And when they later made their way downstairs for breakfast Steve couldn´t stop smiling. Of course Natasha hat to make a few snarky remarks but he didn´t care. He was in love and he was happy for the first time since he went into the ice.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don´t worry, there are still two chapters left ; )


	3. Chapter 3

Steve was beaming with happiness when he grabbed a coffee and watched the people outside of the coffeeshop waiting for Tony. He just came back from the doctor´s appointment in preparation for his phalloplasty. He took a sip from his coffee, trying to calm himself.  
“Hey, Cap,” the billionaire purred and placed a kiss at the soldier´s earlobe. “Are you alright?”  
“Tony!” Steve could hardly stop himself from pulling his lover into a kiss. He wasn´t feeling confident enough for public affection just yet.  
During the next five minutes Steve told Tony more about dicks than the billionaire ever wanted to know. The smaller man nodded and tried to understand what his lover was talking about, but Steve was way too excited to care.  
“When´s the big day?” he asked, dipping a cookie into his mug.  
“Friday. Next week.” Steve stared into his coffee and smiled.  
Tony snuggled closer so their thighs touched under the table. Tony´s small hand made its way to Steve´s knee, squeezing gently.  
“Glad to know my favorite soldier is happy.”  
The taller man chuckled.  
“I thought Thor was your favorite soldier.”  
Pouting, Tony took another sip from his coffee that probably consisted of more cream than actual coffee.  
“My favorite boyfriend then?”  
The soldier choked on his coffee and started coughing. But he still smiled when he caught his breath again.  
“How many boyfriends do you have?”  
There was this cute blush on Tony´s cheeks again. Steve couldn´t help but stare at this handsome man that always acted so tough but was so kindhearted. He placed one of his large hands at Tony´s shoulder, gently massaging him with his thumb.  
“Wait a second, let me think,” Tony replied with a smirk that probably should have looked quirky but was just cute instead. “One. That is if you agree to date me.”  
Steve acted as if he had to think about it and Tony threw his cookie at him.  
“Just say yes, you idiot!” he hissed. “I won´t ask again!”  
The soldier laughed and hugged his tiny boyfriend.  
“It´s an honor, Sir,” he teased while Tony hid his face behind Steve´s broad shoulders.  
“I hate you, Rogers.”  
“I hate you, too, Stark.”

It was on the news only six hours after Steve had left the clinic. The gossip was floating around the internet, new theories came up faster than Steve could catch up with them. Of course, Tony was outraged when Friday informed the two men about the news that everyone in the country probably knew by now that Steve Rogers had asked a doctor for phalloplasty.  
“I even paid her to shut her mouth about that!” Tony huffed at the screen. “This little bitch! I will make her pay for that, I...!”  
“Tony,” Steve simply said, hugging his boyfriend from behind. They had made their way back to the Avengers Tower earlier. The soldier had quietly hoped to be able to spend some time alone with Tony but the gossip seemed to be more important for Tony right now. “Language.”  
“Fuck you and your language!” He nearly screamed. “I wanted to make you happy! I didn´t want the world to know about...”  
“About me being a trans-man?” Steve asked and placed a kiss on Tony´s cheek. “We can not change that anymore. Everyone knows that I either have a tiny penis or that I was not born with one.”  
The billionaire looked like he wanted to argue but closed his mouth instead to kiss his taller boyfriend.  
“Alright,” he sighed. “What are we going to do now?”  
Steve had to think about that for a whole minute before he finally closed his eyes and said, “I want you to organize a press conference for tomorrow.”  
Tony raised his eyebrows.  
“A week ago you were too shy to tell me about your lack of dick. And now you want the whole world to know?” He pulled Steve into a hug. “They... they might hate you, Cap. I don´t want that for you.”  
“That can´t be helped,” Captain America answered. “There are more people like me out there, right?”  
He waited for Tony´s little nod as a confirmation.  
“If they see that I am a trans-man maybe they will find the confidence to be themselves, too. I remember hiding my desire to become a man too well. When Bucky told me it was fine and that he would support me I was incredibly happy. I want that for other people as well.”  
The billionaire looked at him for a few seconds and cleared his throat.  
“You are an angel, Steven Rogers. Do you even know that?”  
The soldier laughed.  
“I´m not an angel. I´m just a kid from Brookly trying to do the right thing.”

Steve swallowed hard and tried to calm his racing heart down by some breathing techniques he learned during WW2. It wasn´t helping. Tony reached out for his hand and squeezed gently. He was only smiling for Steve´s sake, the soldier knew that and he was thankful for it.  
“Ready to face the sharks?” the billionaire joked and kissed him on the lips.  
“You have to practice your motivational speeches,” Steve replied with a forced smile.  
He let go off Tony´s hand and made his way to the conference room where Tony had gathered two dozens of journalists from the whole country. Faced with the cameras and microphones the soldier had to remind himself several times that he was Captain America and he never ran away.  
The first questions about the mysterious doctor´s appointment were flying through the room. Steve lifted his hands and made the journalists go quiet, a trick he learned from Tony who was always so charismatic. The billionaire never seemed to be nervous when talking to crowds. Steve envied him.  
“Whatever you have heard,” he said calmly, “is probably true.”  
He took a deep breath.  
“I was born with a female body. When I turned 18 my best friend helped me to transition from female to male and the super soldier serum that turned me into Captain America also helped me get this typically male body.”  
He smiled into the camera that was right in front of him.  
“Except for what is between my legs. And when I learned that in the 21th century it is possible to build male genitalia from a forearm I decided to take last step to finish my journey that started in 1936.”  
And against the flood of questions that filled the room he said, “I, Steven Grant Rogers, am a trans-man. And I wish for every single trans-person in the world that they find a way to be themselves, just like I did.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Only one chapter left!


	4. Chapter 4

“Are you nervous?”   
Tony´s hands looked so small compared to Steve´s own. He found it cute and couldn´t help but kiss his boyfriend over the table of the diner they found themselves in after a long day of preparation for the surgery in two days.   
“Of course I am,” the soldier replied, absentmindedly petting Tony. “I have waited my whole life for this.”  
“We´ll celebrate as soon as you wake up,” the billionaire promised with a dirty smirk.   
Steve chuckled.   
“I won´t have any sensation in it for at least a few months.”  
That didn´t seem to stop Tony´s enthusiastic thoughts about being face-fucked by Captain America, though. He was about to describe in all details what his talented tongue was about to do to the Captain´s new dick when Steve crossed his arms in front of his chest and sighed.   
“Tony, please! We´re in public!”  
The billionaire only smirked again.   
“Aww, don´t tell me your womanizer best friend wasn´t banging some girl in an alleyway while you were watching out for other people.”  
With a blush spreading across his face Steve shook his head.   
“No! No public sex! I already told you so.” He intended to sound rigid but he had to laugh halfway through.   
Tony pulled him into a kiss - their first public kiss! - and Steve couldn´t bring himself to close his eyes. His boyfriend looked so relaxed and excited about the phalloplasty at the same time. It obviously was important to Tony that Steve was happy.   
When Tony let go of his lips the soldier looked around with his heart pounding in his chest. He tried to tell himself that in the 21th century nobody would mind two men kissing. They would be fine! No need to make himself panic about it.   
“Cap? Are you alright?” Tony asked.   
“I´m nervous,” Captain America confessed. “I have never kissed another man in public.”  
“What are they gonna do about it?” His boyfriend smiled. “Kick us out of the restaurant? Us? Two of the Avengers? I don´t think they would dare something like this.”  
“Thank you, Tony.”  
The cute blush was appearing on Tony´s face again. God, Steve would never get enough of it. He kissed him gently when all what he wanted to do right now was to slam his tiny boyfriend against the wall and kiss him until they were both out of breath. He tried not to think about it too hard.   
“Will you be there when I wake up?” Steve asked and his heart skipped a beat when his tiny boyfriend nodded eagerly.   
“Of course! You´re mine now and I take care of what is mine!”  
A loud, genuine laugh escaped the soldier. He pulled Tony closer to kiss him with a smile. Everything was going to be alright. 

The first thing Steve felt when he woke up after being asleep for eight hours was how hot his body felt. Maybe it was due to the heavy blanket covering him, maybe it was from the pain in his crotch that pulsed through his body.   
Opening his eyes took him an eternity. The single room they brought him after the phalloplasty was not entirely dark. The dim light was enough for Steve´s enhanced eyesight to make out a person sitting next to his bed.   
The nurse smiled at him, checking his pulse.   
“Good morning, Captain,” she said, obviously excited to meet the famous Avenger, but Steve felt too dizzy to care. “The operation went well. There were no complications and you didn´t even need a blood conserve.”  
Speaking was too difficult at the moment. But he wanted to see if everything between his legs looked like he envisioned. He tried to sit up, his upper body covered by a white shirt. The nurse pushed him back into the pillows.   
“Please do not move until tomorrow.” She still smiled at him. “The phallus is alright. You may see it in a few days but right now you need to rest and recover, Sir.”  
He opened his mouth trying to make the words come out but for the first seconds he just rambled until his thoughts kept up with his body.   
“Wh....where.... where´s Tony?” He swallowed, his mouth felt so dry. “Mr Stark.”  
“You are allowed to have visitors from 9 AM until 8 PM.”  
Steve´s eyes wandered to the clock on the opposite wall. Half past four. It was pitch black outside.   
“Please rest,” the nurse advised him. “If you are in pain I can turn up the morphine. The wounds will heal quickly and you probably won´t need it anymore in four days.”  
The soldier nodded, just a slight bow of his head and the nurse was on her feet to help him immediately. When the pain finally subsided he closed his eyes again and tried to fall asleep. But he couldn´t stop smiling.  
Even though his body hurt he felt great, endorphin rushing through his veins. It took him hours to fall asleep. 

He woke up only a few hours later when another nurse entered the room to bring him his breakfast. Steve wasn´t feeling hungry but ate it anyway. His body needed the nutrients.   
His left arm was mostly useless so he had to ask the nurse to give him his phone. He had 76 unread messages from his team, 66 came from Tony.   
“I´m fine,” he texted his boyfriend and got a reply immediately.   
“I´ll be there in 10 mins.”  
Steve smiled at himself, rested his head back on the pillow and waited until Tony entered the room in a hurry. The soldier laughed at the sight of his boyfriend.   
“You brought me flowers?”  
“Thought you would appreciate them,” the billionaire pouted, placed a vase at the nightstand and put the flowers inside.   
He sat down beside Steve and kissed him.   
“How do you feel, Cap?”  
“I can not feel much right now.” He nodded towards the morphine.   
“Are you in pain?” Tony sounded alarmed, squeezing Steve´s fingers.   
“No, I´m alright,” the soldier reassured. “Just tired.”  
“The team will show up tomorrow. I thought you maybe wanted to rest today and not have ten thousand people asking you about your dick,” he chuckled.  
“Thank you, Tony.”   
“Stop it, big guy. I´m glad I made you happy.”  
“I mean it. I owe you a lot,” the soldier insisted.   
“Let me see your dick in return,” Tony smirked.   
His head was resting on Steve´s shoulder. The position looked really uncomfortable but the billionaire didn´t move an inch, just snuggling closer, careful not to hurt his taller boyfriend.   
“I´m not allowed to see it, yet. I bet it looks awful, not healed and anything.”  
Tony bite down on his shoulder.   
“Don´t talk about my boyfriend´s cock like that!”  
They both laughed and it hurt but Steve didn´t mind. He didn´t mind being in the hospital for two weeks, he didn´t mind the pain, he didn´t mind the catheter nor the lack of physical activity. He just felt complete for the first time in his life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yay, I did it! Please let me know if you liked the fanfiction. Have a great day!


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